On February 21,1996, I went to work as a commercial carpenter, like on any
normal day for the past 29 1/2 years with beginning thoughts, plans, hopes, 
and dreams of retirement in the not to distant future ... but this day would
prove to be far from normal ... and "these" hopes and dreams would be
shattered forever ... and my life as I knew it would also change ... change
forever !

The 'Nightmare from Hell" began around 2:00 pm, as a 90 ton crane began 
hoisting construction materials to the roof of the two-story building we were
remodeling .  Scrap materials from the roof needed to be lowered from the
roof also, but the doors on the "dumpster" (a large metal container) needed
to be closed first to receive the scrap material .  Another worker and I
began securing the doors, but even though the crane operator saw us in the
process of closing the doors, he still began lowering the first load from
the roof. As he was swinging the load away from the building and lowering it
down half-way (at the same time) he saw that we were still securing the
doors to the dumpster and in danger ... so he "braked" the load at that
point ... but the "scrap-load" was "slung" on a 4 x 8 sheet of plywood with
no sides or ropes to secure the scrap material from falling off ... so as
the load came to the end of its swing, a 65 pound exhaust fan fell some 25 -
30 feet, and landed on my head ... knocking me to the ground ... but by the
grace of God and the hard hat I was wearing, my life was spared ... BUT I
knew not what changes, frustration, pain, and tears would lie ahead for me !

I did not get taken for medical care for more than an hour until I realized I
needed to initiate it myself ... an ambulance was not called, so in my
disoriented, dazed, and unknown physical condition, I was taken by a
co-worker to an acute care clinic ... then to Stanford Hospital Emergency
for a Cat Scan, neck and shoulder x-rays that showed negative .  After six
hours, I was released ... not yet being told that I had a concussion or the
reason for my various symptoms I was having ... just that there were no
broken bones or "visible" brain injury !

Not until two days later, when I insisted on going to Santa Clara Valley 
Medical Hospital Emergency, did I find out what was wrong with me !  I found 
out first from a NURSE, and then later from a doctor that I did, indeed, 
suffer from a concussion, and my symptoms I was having was due to "post TBI 
(Traumatic Brain Injury) Syndrome", and that further tests needed to be done 
to determine the extent of the brain damage .

March 8, 1996, I had my first "seizure" (the doctors are still calling it
IMC ... Involuntary Muscle Contractions, because it did not show up on the 
one ENG test Ihad on April 8, 1996, when I had another "seizure" lasting  2 
hours that was triggered by bright flashing lights ... with a trip to 
emergency!)  Previous to this "seizure" I had an EEG test done on March 4, 
1996, when I had a "seizure" for an hour ... with another trip to emergency !  With each visit
to emergency, another Cat Scan and set of neck x-rays were done .
The "seizures" have continued with different time durations ... On May 22,
1996, 1 hour ... June 6, 1996, 1/2 hour ...and the last major one June 12,
1996, 3 1/2 hours that was video taped ! Further "seizures" of shorter
duration still continue .

My physical state, during a "seizure", is conscious, but with the feeling of
in "dreamland", and I'm unable to voluntarily move any of my body parts ...
my legs
and hips will jump 1-2 feet off the location I'm lying on every 10 - 20
seconds ...
if my legs are held, my upper body will curl forward in "gut-wrenching"
bends ...
and I will hear no sounds and see nothing but blackness  ... then a ringing
in my ears !  Afterwards, I am physically exhausted !!!

After seeing one doctor for two months, and him thinking I could go back to 
work on March 29, 1996 ... and my trying ... but fell with my walker ... 
ending up in emergency again ... I changed doctors !  I got a new doctor ... 
saw more "specialists" ... and had more tests !  The one Neuropsychological 
test showed cognitive deficiencies in various areas ... so I have undergone 
extensive therapy in that area with a neuro-psychologist and a speech 
therapist ... this involves trying to recover your memory abilities, etc.

During these past six months, I have dealt with the "seizures", memory loss
continuous headaches, neck pain, dizziness, and nausea ... then there is the
full range of emotional feelings like ... denial, anger, frustration, hurt,
depression ... being misunderstood, unaccepted, unloved, and uncontrollable
of crying ... AND more symptoms I can not remember!

But, having said all this ...I just want to say, that if you are one of FAITH,
and have a relationship with God, your trip down this very bumpy road will
be much easier ... especially during the depressed moments when "the pits of
Hell" rage
against you, and you experience "NO LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL"

I would, also, suggest reaching out to a CLOSE friend (or find, and make one
like I did on the internet, TBI Support Group) who understands where you are
in your life now; or, at least, is willing to be a good listener of your
DEEPEST feelings !
This will be of great help to you in progressing down this NEW "road of life."
I have only just begun ... begun down this personal journey ... and I still
have my dark moments ... BUT I have gotten to the point where I will NEVER 
lose sight of the light at tunnels end ... even though it may get dim at 
times... AND my reason is because I have a "Power Source" in Jesus Christ, 
my Lord, and my Savior who promises He will ALWAYS be there for me ... to 
CARRY me through the most difficult of times ... AND because of Him, I will 
be able to weather all of life's storms with His strength and Unconditional
Love !!!

Finally, I want to thank deeply my dear friends, Chris and Debbie Wilson who
made this all possible through their www page ... and for their dedication,
caring, and unconditional love for others that are hurting and struggling 
down this TBI road... a road that is not paved with gold !  They are precious friends that
I'll never forget and would not have known ... if I had not been brought 
down this road less traveled !  My respect and love goes out to you, Chris 
and Debbie, and may God richly bless you both always !!!

By : Larry J. Huisingh
     August 25, 1996

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God,
to them who are the called according to His purpose."
Romans 8:28